The MBTI Types As Generals

Have you ever wondered what each MBTI type would be like if they had an army at their disposal? Well, wonder no more...

INTJ:
The INTJ finds the prospect of leading an army of so many different people daunting, so they put them to work building a cloning factory where they can mass-produce INTJs. Just as the factory is almost built, the ENFJ arrives and convinces the neglected soldiers of the INTJ's army to join theirs. The INTJ is left sitting dejected among the hollow structure of their semi-completed cloning factory, absently trying to come up with ways to finish it themselves.

INTP:
The INTP's army wonders if their general really exists, because they never see the INTP emerge from their tent. The only people who enter and exit are advisers or scouts. Finally they are stumbled upon by the ESTP and their army, who gleefully pounces on the opportunity to wipe out the reclusive and under-defended INTP.

ENTJ:
The ENTJ quickly wins the undying loyalty of their soldiers, crushing anyone in their path with ruthless efficiency. Finally they are left sitting on the throne of their empire, ruling as a benevolent dictator, where they are mistaken for a tyrant and assassinated by the ISTP.

ENTP:
The ENTP comes up with a clever plan for besieging castles, and begins to eagerly and relentlessly conquer territory. Eventually they drive their officers and soldiers to and past the point of exhaustion and frustration, however, and they are subsequently killed in a mutiny, leaving their army leaderless and disbanding.

INFJ:
The INFJ balks at the horrible realities of war, and instead turns their army into a police force and relief group, temporarily occupying territory and restoring order and prosperity before moving on. They are eventually confronted by the ENTJ's army, who easily defeats the under-trained and peace-loving INFJ.

INFP:
The INFP takes one look at their soldiers lined up for battle and breaks down in tears at their discipline and loyalty. They dismiss their soldiers back to their homes and families, throw away their armaments, and are discovered soon after by a raiding party who kills them despite the INFP's lack of resistance.

ENFJ:
The ENFJ mesmerizes their army with rousing speeches, leading them to victory after victory, winning the admiration of their men and the love of the people they rule. Eventually they run up against the ENTJ, who challenges them to single combat. They accept and are promptly shot in the back by the ENTJ's men as soon as the opportunity presents itself.

ENFP:
The ENFP soon wins the love of their soldiers, mingling among them and getting to each of them personally. They are terrible at strategy, however, and are easily lured into a clever trap and destroyed by the ENTP.

ISTJ:
The ISTJ whips their army into peak shape, discipline, and effectiveness in no time. They train alongside their men and are utterly respected by all. Eventually they fall prey to sickness, having over-trained, and perish soon afterwards.

ISFJ:
The ISFJ's dedication to truth and justice wins them the admiration of all they come into contact with, even if everyone doesn't always agree with them. One day they run across a caravan of refugees fleeing the destruction of the ESTP, and are destroyed trying to protect them from the ESTJ.

ESTJ:
The ESTJ utilizes brute force and efficient tactics to win their way to the top, eventually establishing a military state where they happily sit back and enjoy their orderly rule. Unfortunately they fall under attack from the ENTP and are defeated by an internal dissident who opens the gates and lets the ENTP's army in.

ESFJ:
The ESFJ's army travels from province to province, always inciting fear and suspicion on their arrival, but quickly reassuring the people they mean no harm and are here to help. On one particular stop, they end up spending too much time with the populace, and half the soldiers get married off to the locals. The ESFJ, now not wanting to leave, decides to settle down and develop the countryside.

ISTP:
The ISTP takes one look at the many troops before them and abandons the army, striking off on their own; reasoning that they don't need an army, they're an ISTP.

ISFP:
The ISFP shuns the idea of conventional warfare, and instead inspires their soldiers to be the change from within. They become an unstoppable cultural force, but are forgotten to military history.

ESTP:
The ESTP is so excited by the prospect of leading an army that they attack everything in sight, burning and pillaging their way across the countryside. They are at last confronted by the ENFJ, who enlists the help of the ISFJ to destroy the ESTP's blight once and for all.

ESFP:
The ESFP doesn't even consider fighting, instead turning their army into a sorority with them at the head. They have a great time partying it up until local resources run dry, and they eventually starve to death.

Wonder Woman: Review

I generally like to see a movie twice before I write my review of it. But I think this movie has enough interesting things to evaluate that I'm doing this review after I've just seen it in theaters.

For those of you who may (somehow) not know, Wonder Woman is about Diana, an Amazon (Greek warrior lady) princess who grows up to leave her island and live among the puny humans so that they stop fighting so much.

"Stop fighting!" she says as she slams her shield across a guy's face. "It's not productive!"

Many, many people were in high anticipation for this film, despite the fact that Zack Snyder (more like Slyder amirite) is still somehow directing movies for DC.

*edgeways look at DC* Are you all in your right minds? After Batman vs. Superman? 

In case you missed my review of that movie ^

I'm not going to delve into a detailed plot summary or any such spoilerific content, but I would like to discuss some of the philosophy in this movie (from a Christian perspective)...so

PHILOSOPHY ALERT

Let's start with the Amazons. The Amazons are an ancient Greek tribe of warrior women who, in somewhat awkward opposition to DC's portrayal of them, were allegedly the kids of the war god Ares and a wood nymph.

First of all, any tribe that is comprised of only one sex limits itself. That is simply a fact of nature. But to further grasp the wrongness of the concept, we as Christians should consider that God created man and woman for each other, to complement each other's strengths and weaknesses. Taking the right and good (and great) relationship that God designed between the sexes and tearing it in half never leads to any good (as can be evidenced by our culture today). 

But to add to that, the roles of women as warriors in battle - as the Amazons are - is one that is not supported by Scripture. 

Now hold on, back off, don't tear my head off just yet - let me explain. There is, quite simply, no mention of women in combat in the Scriptures, nor teaching to support that concept. The closest you can get is Deborah in the book of Judges, but she doesn't participate in battle, just directs Gideon as commanded by God. 

To be clear, I do not think women should be combatants. I don't believe it's a biblical concept. Certainly, women can be in supportive roles (that is, after all, where they are needed the most and where they can contribute the most), but I don't think women should be on the front lines shooting guns (UNLESS we're about to be taken over by zombie Nazis and there is literally no other resort).

For a clearer dissertation on the topic of women in warfare I would point you in the direction of this article from Answers in Genesis, which I think does a brilliant job outlining the whys and why nots on the subject.

After all those assertions, I would like to accompany them by acknowledging that misogyny is absolutely a reality, particularly back in the days of World War I and especially back in Greco-Roman times where the Amazons originally existed. Denying women the opportunity to occupy themselves with work while being single or cast votes as an active citizen is wrong. But I think we've swung the pendulum a liiiiittle too far to the other side.

So! I bet you're tired of all that rambling on feminism and whatnot. Let's move on to the other issue with this movie - its trash morality.

Have I seen this before?

Wonder Woman is, by a lot of standards, a good person. I would go so far as to say a great person. She shows concern and compassion for the evils people are suffering, and you can see how disappointed she is that, despite all her desire to help, she can't help everyone. She's a regular old Captain Amer-

oh, erm, I should...

I meant...

it's like...

not that DC is...copying anyone or....anything...

yeah...

Does that mean Diana is going to...

heeeeeeeyyyyy...

She's got good morals, sure. But what we as Christians should realize is she has a pathetic foundation for them. As is so profoundly stated in the movie:

"It isn't about what you deserve...it's about what you believe."

Whoa there DC. You've gone so deep I think - oh wait, never mind, you haven't even stepped into the shallows yet. In fact, I'm not even quite sure where you are. The desert, perhaps?

Even the desert has more growth than that chain of thought.

END PHILOSOPHY

The movie was, overall, fine work, despite its director *edgeways glance*. The characters were interesting, fun, and the humor was (for the most part) enjoyable. The movie did play out a lot like Captain Amer-

Captin Amur-

Capitan Am-

...that other movie about a righteous superhero who gains amazing powers and ends up fighting a world war with their band of misfits and rogues behind enemy lines in an attempt to destroy an enemy superweapon and who loses someone dear to them on a vital mission. 

Music was great. I don't care for Zack Snyder's directing, but the music to his movies never ceases to satisfy. I want the soundtrack. Will buy/10. As for visuals...I mean, it's a Snyder film. Visuals are as good as my scrambled eggs - meaning delicious.

The story was solid, though not too incredible. There were some parts that seemed somewhat cliche, but it was investworthy enough.

As far as cleanliness goes, there is definitely some stuff that I could do without, including a scene with almost full-frontal male nudity, a rather open discussion of the birds and the bees between an unmarried man and woman (as they lie right next to each other), and taking the Lord's name in vain twice (o - m - g fashion). 

Wonder Woman's outfit is also not the best. I called it a glorified swimsuit in my Batman vs. Superman review - which it is, and I stand by that title unashamed. Of my skill in denouncing stupid uniforms, that is.

"But Michael, it gives full range of motion," I hear you whine. You know, that's a brilliant idea. Let's just give it to the guys, then!

What? No, they already have pants? Shame. If only women could wear pants too.

I give Wonder Woman a 7/10 - could watch in theaters once, and only once. Wouldn't mind to own it or borrow it from the library, but it is definitely not my favorite superhero movie. 

Fate/Zero: Anime Review

Ladies and gentlemen, if you'd like the really short version of this review, here it is:

This anime is amazing. It scores a 10/10 on almost everything I can think of. So if you have free time (ha!) sometime ever, put aside some time to watch it. If it's not a genre you like, well, tough. I watched Your Lie in April, a genre I absolutely despise, and I can honestly that anime is a work of art.

That said, let's get down to business.

Short synopsis (spoiler-free):

Fate/Zero is about the war to obtain the Holy Grail, a vessel that can grant one wish. Forget why people be fighting over it, they just are.

Did someone mention the Holy Grail?

The war is waged between seven masters and seven servants; the masters being mages (with a few minor exceptions) who summon the servants - heroes of legend with extraordinary abilities. Each servant has a different class, the classes being: Saber, Archer, Lancer, Rider, Berserker, Assassin, and Caster. 

Fate/Zero tells the story of each master and servant, all fighting to obtain the Grail for different reasons: immortality, absolution, world peace, magic...reasons, et cetera. They all engage in intrigue, assassination (guess which servant is good at that part), espionage, and sometimes all-out brawling in order to eliminate the other masters/servants and obtain the Grail for themselves.

Depicted - the servants (I won't say who's who, but you can probably guess).

Characters:

Fate/Zero shines in its brilliant character portrayal and development. You'd think, having at least fourteen "main" characters (each master/servant pair), that one pair would stand out above the rest as the real main characters. But that's not really the case with Fate/Zero. Sure, the cast gets thinner as people are eliminated, so the later characters get more development than the less fortunate ones, but each character has a clear motivation, is memorable, and has personality. You even sometimes get stuck wondering who you're supposed to be rooting for, and that's the true genius of what Fate/Zero does: juggling all its characters like a master and dropping them at just the opportune moment to make their death pointed and influential.

Music:

The soundtrack for this anime is exceptional. The sweeping orchestrals and haunting choruses lend huge emotion to each episode, and are perfectly timed with their scenes. You'll have many chills, thrills, and heartbreaks (particularly near the end). I own this soundtrack, I find it that beautiful.

Visuals:

As far as budget, Fate/Zero had a nice one, and it's really reflected in just how good the animation is. You can see it in the fight scenes, in the special effects, and particularly in Berserker. Man, that guy looks awesome.

Tell me I'm wrong. I dare you.

Cleanliness:
It's hard to fault Fate/Zero here at all, because the anime is surprisingly devoid of sexual material (thankfully) save for one scene where it's implied that a guy is, ahem, in his birthday suit (nothing explicit is shown) and another that is just...plain disgusting (not really sure how to explain, but it doesn't show anything explicit either). Cussing is minuscule to nonexistent - surprise, modern media! You can actually make something good without swearing! Helloooooo!

Sorry. But anyway, if Fate/Zero had to be faulted on anything, it would be the excessive violence in the actual anime. There's quite a few murders, particularly with one master/servant pair who are blatant serial killers, and there is also fighting aplenty. So be warned, it's a bloody anime with some traumatic content. PG-13 at least.

Another point of...perhaps fault would be the philosophy expressed throughout the anime. There are numerous different points of view presented, and the anime seems to leave you to answer the question of which way is right. Personally, I see error in all of them, and would simply advise that you not get lost in the endless stream of assertions made by each character. This anime is not for the person who doesn't have their head on straight.


Overall Impression:
I give Fate/Zero a 9.5 out of 10, because nothing can be truly perfect. But I think this anime gets pretty close.