The Princess Bride

Many of you, I'm sure, have seen the classic "Princess Bride". I'm not going to outline it for you so if you haven't seen it, go see it.

It's a comedy. I think. Right? Yeah, I'm pretty sure.
The little kid's the most annoying character next to Humperdink. Dahhh. I wish they'd both just die.

My favorite part has to be when the grandpa says to the kid 'Yes, you're very smart. Shut up.'
Of course, the whole movie's over-the-top and full of cliches. The plot is randomly revealed through pointless exposition scenes. You come up against a character and tadaa, they give you a plot point. With no obligation to do so. Still, it's a hoot.

You know when Buttercup is captured? I counted almost a dozen times she could have escaped. Instead, she's all like 'ooh, aah, helpless little me'.
Not to mention the several times Wesley could have been murdered by Viccini's counterparts. Instead, they're all 'fair play' and whatnot. Pish. Just kill him already! There is no glory in defeat, nor honor in death.
Oh yeah, and there's one scene where Prince Humperdink jumps onto his saddle from a high ledge. As he hit the leather I winced. Just...wow. The guy didn't even cringe. His family jewels must be made of steel, or something.

And Buttercup's 'twoo wuv' act in the second part is just...wushmush. You may be able to call other people names now, sweetheart, but I'm not foohooWAHT! Did you just call me a slimy newt? Oh well. Too bad.
My favorite character by far has to be Miracle Max. "True love, is the greatest thing in the woyld. Except for a nice MLT; Mutton Lettuce and Tomato where the mutton is nice and lean and the tomatoes are fresh and ripe...mmm it's so perky, I love it."

There's also a reference that totally doesn't belong in that type of movie. When they're in the fire swamp, Wesley says, "It's not that bad." Buttercup gives him a strange look, then he says "Well I'm not saying I'd like to build a summer home here but the trees are actually quite lovely."
Twentieth century.......FTW! Whatever.

Despite the plot (and acting) being quite cheesy, this movie is a true classic. If you haven't seen it, you've missed out on life. SEE IT.

The Worst Female Celebrity Ever

DAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!

SOMEONE HELP MEEEE! I DON'T WANT TO WRITE THIS!!!

But you must, precious!
Shut up, Reaper.
You will. Or else.
FINE!!

Nicki...*HACK HACK* Minaj. There, I said it.

She's known as a famous singer. I say 'known' because she can't sing.

Yes, I made the mistake of listening to one of her music videos a long time ago.

I'm now convinced she's one of the devil's many wives. And it's not a mistake I'll make again.
PLEASE. Don't ever listen to her "music". It's a waste of your life.

I suppose I should give some reasons. First off.
LYRICS, bleep. USE THEM.
She has no lyrics. She has words that ryme. "Starships fly, touch the sky," is about as complicated as she gets. Throw in a bunch of swearwords with that dump, stir and serve. Feeds about twenty million mindless zombies.
MUSIC. YOU HAVE NONE.
I'm dead certain she uses autotune, and even if she doesn't, she sounds awful anyway. How can you mess up Autotune? Well alongside Rebecca Black, she managed. It's just plain awful.

Why do so many of our celebrities have to be so messed up?
Whoops, forgive my slip of the tongue. They're America's celebrities, not ours.
Or, they're American in nationality. That's what I mean. Yeah.

GET OUT OF THIS COUNTRY.

I'm sure you might be wondering why I'm writing this now...well, I was sorting through some pictures lately and found one about Nick...eh, that woman. Alien. Whatever.
In the picture, she's tweeting something like "Brazil, here I come!!" and Brazil is replying "Eh...no thanks [she-who-must-not-be-named], stay wherever it is you are."

BRAVO, Brazil. Bravo.

Man of Steel

Hey people,
I just recently watched the new Superman Movie, Man of Steel. I admit, I'd heard so much about it on the Internet and from others, I was pretty excited to see it. It got a lot of hype.

I'm not going to talk about the plot that much, if at all. I don't want to spoil it for you who haven't seen it.

It was awesome. Superman, for me, was always kind of a cheesy hero. But this movie did away with that. Finally, he learned to wear his underwear on the inside of his pants!
But I have to say, the movie wasn't cheesy at all. The alien culture that was Superman's origin was unique and realistic. The characters were well-developed and interesting. And the plot was cool. I fully recommend you watch it, and buy it when it comes out.

Wow. For such a long and awesome movie, that's kind of a short review.
Mah ii.